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A.A.Milne		Butter for my bread
A.A.Milne		Lines and squares
A.A.Milne		Bad Sir |Brian Botany
Leigh Hunt 2 sonnets		To a fish + A fish replies

 

BAD SIR BRIAN BOTANY by A.A.Milne Sir Brian had a battleaxe with great big knobs on. He went among the villagers and blipped them on the head. On Wednesday and on Saturday, Especially on the latter day, He called on all the cottages and this is what he said:   "I am Sir Brian!" (Ting-ling!) "I am Sir Brian!" (Rat-tat!) "I am Sir Brian, "As bold as a lion! "Take that, and that, and that!"   Sir Brian had a pair of boots with great big spurs on;. A fighting pair of which he was particularly fond. On Tuesday and on Friday, Just to make the street look tidy, He'd collect the passing villagers and kick them in the pond.   "I am Sir Brian!" (Sper-lash!) "I am Sir Brian!" (Sper-losh!) "I am Sir Brian, "As bold as a Lion! "Is anyone else for a wash?"   Sir Brian woke one morning and he couldn't find his battleaxe. He walked into the village in his second pair of boots. He had gone a hundred paces When the street was full of faces And the villagers were round him with ironical salutes.   "You are Sir Brian? My, my. "You are Sir Brian? Dear, dear. "You are Sir Brian "As bold as a lion? "Delighted to meet you here!"   Sir Brian went a journey and he found a lot of duckweed. They pulled him out and dried him and they blipped him on the head. They took him by the breeches And they hurled him into ditches And they pushed him under waterfalls and this is what they said:   "You are Sir Brian -- don't laugh! "You are Sir Brian -- don't cry! "You are Sir Brian "As bold as a lion -- "Sir Brian the Lion, goodbye!"   Sir Brian struggled home again and chopped up his battleaxe. Sir Brian took his fighting boots and threw them in the fire. He is quite a different person Now he hasn't got his spurs on, And he goes about the village as B. Botany, Esquire.   "I am Sir Brian? Oh, no! "I am Sir Brian? Who's he? "I haven't any title, I'm Botany; "Plain Mr. Botany (B.)"

TO A FISH You strange, astonished-looking, angle-faced, Dreary-mouthed, gaping wretches of the sea, Gulping salt water everlastingly, Cold-blooded, though with red your blood be graced, And mute, though dwellers in the roaring waste; And you, all shapes beside, that fishy be- Some round, some flat, some long, all devilry, Legless, unloving, infamously chaste:- 0 scaly, slippery, wet, swift, staring wights, What is't ye do? What life lead ? Eh, dull goggles? How do ye vary your vile days and nights ? How pass your Sundays? Are ye still but toggles In ceaseless wash? Still nought but gapes, and bites, And drinks, and stares, diversified with boggles?    A FISH REPLIES Amazing monster! that, for aught I know, With the first sight of thee didst make our race For ever stare! 0 flat and shocking face, Grimly divided from the breast below! Thou that on dry land horribly dost go With a split body, and most ridiculous pace, Prong after prong, disgracer of all grace, Long-useless-finned, haired, upright, unwet, slow! 0 breather of unbreathable, sword-sharp air, How canst exist? How bear thyself, thou dry And dreary sloth? What particle canst share Of the only blessed life, and watery ? 1 sometimes see of ye an actual pair Go by, linked fin by fin, most odiously.

BUTTER FOR MY BREAD The King asked The Queen, and The Queen asked The Dairymaid: "Could we have some butter for The Royal slice of bread?" The Queen asked The Dairymaid. The Dairymaid Said, "Certainly, I'll go and tell The cow Now Before she goes to bed."     The Dairymaid She curtsied, And went and told The Alderney: "Don't forget the butter for The Royal slice of bread." The Alderney Said sleepily: "You'd better tell His Majesty That many people nowadays Like marmalade Instead."   The Dairymaid Said, "Fancy!" And went to Her Majesty, She curtsied to the Queen, and She turned a little red: "Excuse me, Your Majesty, For taking of The liberty, But marmalade is tasty, if It's very Thickly Spread."   The Queen said "Oh!" And went to His Majesty: "Talking of the butter for The royal slice of bread, Many people Think that Marmalade Is nicer. Would you like to try a little Marmalade Instead?"   The King said, "Bother!" And then he said, "Oh, deary me!" The King sobbed, "Oh, deary me!" And went back to bed. "Nobody," He whimpered, "Could call me A fussy man; I only want A little bit Of butter for My bread!"   The Queen said, "There, there!" And went to The Dairymaid. The Dairymaid Said, "There, there!" And went to the shed. The cow said, "There, there! I didn't really Mean it; Here's milk for his porringer And butter for his bread."   The Queen took The butter And brought it to His Majesty; The King said, "Butter, eh?" And bounced out of bed. "Nobody, " he said, As he kissed her Tenderly, "Nobody," he said As he slid down The banisters, "Nobody, My darling, Could call me a fussy man - BUT I do like a little bit of butter to my bread!"

 

Lines and Squares by A.A. Milne Whenever I walk in a London street, I'm ever so careful to watch my feet; And I keep in the squares, And the masses of bears, Who wait at the corners all ready to eat The sillies who tread on the lines of the street, Go back to their lairs, And I say to them, "Bears, Just look how I'm walking in all the squares!" And the little bears growl to each other, "He's mine, As soon as he's silly and steps on a line." And some of the bigger bears try to pretend That they came round the corner to look for a friend; And they try to pretend that nobody cares Whether you walk in the lines or the squares. But only the sillies believe their talk; It's ever so portant how you walk, And it's ever so jolly to call out, "Bears, Just watch me walking in all the squares!"   NB for learners Written for a child of 6 sillies = silly children portant - should really be important ever so - rather childish language = very

 

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